Getting laid off is a psychological travesty. If you are married and have children, the strain can be unbearable, especially if your husband or wife has expectations that you are unable to meet. Intimacy is lost, respect is lost, and you will spend most of your time facing scowls and criticisms for unrelated peccadilloes.

The temptation in this is to accept whatever job you can get, to get your family off your back, to be a good provider, to “do your share,” but you must resist the temptation.

Find some time to be alone and reflect on what you want. Write down your life goals and plan how the next job can fit in with them. By seeing your life in terms of the big picture, you will come to realize that this last lay off was probably a good thing, a shock to your system to allow you to reach out to the next step.

Now is the time to be bold, and not settle for whatever job you can get, but to try for the job of your dreams. Though you may be harassed to work even degrading work so long as you are bringing in income, don’t do it. Put yourself first. Consider your long term goals. If you do so, everybody else will ultimately benefit from it as well.

For if you get into your dream work, you will be a happy person. And only a happy person can make other people happy.

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